Color me surprised!

Wow! When I heard this news my face must have revealed as much shock and surprise as Joan River's does after a trip to botox land! REEEAAALLLYYYY.

I'm experiencing more emotions (dread) over the new Pussycat Dolls cd, "Doll Domination" than I can muster for Aiken's true confessions.

What next? Lindsey Lohan admits to dating a girl???? Golly, is it Friday already because it sure is freaky! What next, reveal Sarah Palin has no real foreign policy experience?

Hey "People Magazine" how about doing something crazy and cutting edge, like printing the winning numbers to a lottery before it's played, not like a year after the ticket was bought...next!

The World (created by McCain)

For those purist in theology, God made the world in 7 days; apparently that is too slow for John McCain. McCain has decided to quit toiling in the garden of Eden so as to recreate the world (economy) in just 4 days. Who really cares where most of the Middle East ends up on the map, so long as you can see it from your house(s) front porches? And just do away with China and Russia, pesky foreigners, just give us your oil!

It's freaky to think that Mr McCain, a self acknowledged "weak on economy" candidate, wants to stop Halloween, Day Light savings, creation of the blackberry, resolving the feud between Lauren and Heidi and suspend (buy time for Palin) his campaign until he completes a rehaul of the US economy...over the weekend. Did he pick up "Economics 101 for Dummies" and now feels more competent in solving this financial fiasco than all those people who do study the economy on a regular basis?

Does anyone out there really believe anyone on Capitol Hill knows what to do? Will $700 billion be all it costs to patch-and-fix the economy's blow-out?

Given that the two Senators angling to be be the next Prez. have been out on the trail and not present in day-to-day activities in the Senate for quite some time, what makes either think they can do any good now?

I think the dudes from "The Big Bang Theory" should be called in to resolve this mess and not "The House-husbands of Capitol Hill".

Is it sad to note that the only bailout for us from the non-stop campaign of 2007-2008 is a collapse of the economy- why couldn't it have happened sooner?

Now where's Paris when you need her economic savvy?

on my radar: Heart 101

An article on the web caught my attention, it asks how much do you know about your heart.

Heart 101:
Over a 70-year lifetime the average heart will beat 2.5 billion times. Each day the heart pumps out 2,000 gallons of blood through the body. Diet, exercise, blood pressure and genetics all play a role in keeping this hard working muscle in tip-top shape!

My interpretation:
Heart 101: band from Bellevue, Washington, led by sisters Anne and Nancy Wilson- big in the 80's and 90's with hits like "Crazy on You", "Alone", "All I Wanna Do is Make love to You"- with the popular video that promotes male-date rape and keeping children from knowing who their daddy is, and currently unhappy with McCain (and un-Able) for using "barracuda" as a theme song at the RNC.

Over a 70-year span the average heart will beat 2.5 billion times, unless you are Edward Cullen, have met Buffy the Vampire Slayer or are named Dick Cheney (there's no valid proof he has one). 2,000 gallons of blood a day? Where does it all come from? Given that a gallon of water weighs 8+ pounds...that means that about 16,000 pounds of blood moves through you a day! Imagine what it must be like for Drew Carey!
Diet, exercise and blood pressure keep it in tip top shape? How ever is Hulk Hogan still alive? And I thought Angelina Jolie was the hardest working muscle around!

Evil abrewin'

All was quiet this dark and cloudy evening at Hogwarts, but the silence did not equate to innocence and slumber, for not all were sleeping this night.
Evil had threatened this sanct and hollowed learning ground for young witches and wizards, and where, in the past, evil got so close to winning, good still prevailed- but make no mistake, evil was still abrewin'.

Here at Hogwarts it has always been believed that the "strength of good" buoyed the children through those dreadful years, but in the camps of some (mostly the House of Slytherin), murmurs were heard that it was simply the act of "praying the bad away" that brought prosperity; truly an irony (that Slytherin would be praying) not lost on those who lived through the years of "He Whose Name Shall Not Be Spoken", aka "Dick Cheney (or Dan Quayle)".

But on this night a silence was enveloping the grounds, a silence that betrayed its self, so deafening were the awkward pauses. Slight was the breeze, but on it rode a few light whispers, whispers that would have sent chills down the spine of Professor Trelawney had she heard them and recalled her visions from years prior. But her mind is now murky and only a few pieces fall into place, "The one with the power to vanquish approaches...the Dark Lord will mark him as his equal, but he will have power the Dark Lord knows not... and either must die at the hand of the other for neither can live while the other survives..." and so Trelawney goes forth, not knowing, but sensing, an evil emerging once more. What is for certain is that this evil speaks with the parsfaltongue...

The Republican Party Surprise

What's a party if there isn't a surprise thrown in?

While eagerly awaiting the speech of Sarah Palin, Republican delegates were feted with a lavish feast: pasta, veggies, wine, bread, pork loin and a guest appearance/performance by Lindsay Lohan. Despite failing to hit the same "public awareness" that Chris Crocker achieved on youtube by requesting that we "leave Britney alone!", it seems Lindsay's blogging about leaving Jamie Lynn Spears, oops, I mean, Bristol Palin, resonated with the McCain party planners and they invited her. The surprise? The pasta was delivered by a Pizza Hut employee, none other than Bristol's husband to be, Levi Johnston.

I'm hoping Heidi and Spencer are somewhere there filming their experience for use on a show at some later date, then I won't have to miss the Williamses tennis match and catch the highlights in a few months when it runs on MTV.

Explain to me how "kids are off limits" and yet the whole damn clan is pranced out in front of the media?

Other than uncommonly long lines at the men's restrooms, and no signs of Larry Craig, delegates have had few issues to complain about- outside of their candidate.
And the Bush video conference and Cheney's presence.

Oh yeah, and the crab grass.