Britney Spears is answering the call! No, she's not Broadway-bound to star in "The Vagina Monologues"; after a flurry of job interviews this past week (and a stop off at Kevin's with the kids) it has been announced by Britney herself (since she has fired everyone around her)that she will no longer pursue a career in drunkenness, debauchery, motherhood, or singing; she is planning on focusing her time and energy on nunnery (it was too hard to become a Scientologist). She has pledged to spend her time in the Sisterhood of the Traveling NoPanties Covenant and hopes to spread the word of God through animal sounds and rhythmic movements.
Inspired by a night out of partying and then endless viewings of "The Sound of Music", Britney truly believes she can be the next Maria von Trappe; she just needs more children to look after, and thus she shed her two tykes in hopes of gaining 6 more, slightly older, kids. Friends close to the musician, who question her mental stability believe she is more likely to become the next Mary Kay Leturneau before she becomes a saint. Just released court documents bolster those friends concerns, revealing that Britney had hoped to give her kids to anyone but Kevin Federline, with her preference being Maury and Connie, Paris and Nicole, and Sarah Silverman.
Now that's just crazy!
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