My LA motto: “shaken, but not disturbed”
LA- Reuters:
Jermaine Jackson, apparently the official mouthpiece (everything else on Michaels body is fake, so why not this too?) for Michael, announced that Michael just needs some rest and time to think about getting things back to normal. When was the last time he ever thought about being normal? 1973? Sources close to Michael (but none under 15 years of age) claim he is considering moving out of the country; he does have several open-ended tickets for Brazil at his disposal. His passport, which was taken from him months ago, was inadvertently returned to Latoya Jackson. Apparently, he no longer resembles the man in the mirror, or in the photo. Additionally, to “butch” up his image Michael Jackson enrolled in a military training academy. On his first day, when told to drop and do twenty, he refused, stating he never dates anyone over 16. After being expelled, he went home, went to his room, turned on the early warning sensors, drew a bubble bath and refused to eat anything but Peanut Butter and Jelly sandwiches (once the crust was cut-off by Bubbles). And then he thought about being normal.
In unrelated news, Atlanta police have begun stopping cars with tinted glass to ensure that the windows aren’t too dark. Using their new measuring device, dubbed the “Jackson-5 –meter” Police are ticketing those drivers who windows are too dark. Tint ratings are: “Jermaine” or “Tito” are too dark, “Janet” and “LaToya” are passing, while Michael is untinted.
No comments:
Post a Comment