“Harriet Miers chose Coke over Pepsi (and marijuana when she partied late into the night with George W.) when she took the Pepsi Challenge in 1978!”
More shocking revelations have come from the Senate floor where Harriet Miers has been making her rounds and getting down to win votes!
Looking quite hung over, Ms. Miers met the press this morning, discreetly trying to hide BC Powder and Gatorade, two staples from the Dean Martin Emergency Survival Kit!, in her oversized Cheryl Ladd designed purse. “I don’t know how the hell Ruth or Sandra did this”, she was quoted as saying between dry heaves. “I grew up partying with W. and thought this would be easy; no one said anything about having to do shots with Edward Kennedy!” she bemoaned.
Ms. Miers, seen wearing a “jail Delay” t-shirt bought online at moveon.org, has been repeatedly grilled by the Senators about her stance on key court issues, and, having not sufficiently answered their questions, has brought increased scrutiny onto her past. Other tidbits that have been uncovered: she believed in the tooth fairy until seven, was twice sent to the principles office for daydreaming during home ec. classes, never really got the hang of latch-hook rugs, and she was turned away from the debutante society because she dressed too much like June Cleaver when Jackie O was all the rage. What still remains a mystery is her position on many controversial issues such as: boxers or briefs at sleep-overs, did Clinton inhale, what the REAL meaning of Christmas is, and where exactly in the world is Waldo? Senator Orrin Hatch said that, “until she is more forthright in her answers about theses and other critical questions, we will only approve of her for an ambassadorship position in Sudan or the UN”.
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