Where there’s white smoke, there must be a new pope!
Gosh, it all happened so fast! Now what am I going to do with the incredibly exciting Pope Match 2005?
Here’s how the brackets were supposed to play out…
Children’s author and provocative poser vs. the UN Goodwill Ambassador and “Billy Bob’s Blood-wearer”…a collagen collapse at the College of Cardinal’s boost Gucci’s girl: Madonna over (or under) Angelina Jolie…Father Tu-tu over the Father of Anti-Aparteid. Spice-husband David Beckham “sinks” Scott Peterson and Martha, with a few hints from Heloise, cleans up against the “real” housewife, Terri Hatcher.
Desmond Tu-tu trumps Madonna and Martha bedazzles the crowd and wins over Beckham….
Of course, a rogue wave swept in and upturned the ballot box, so there is no clear winner so, it will be a joint-papacy! Imagine the good wafers that will now be served with a tasty “grown in the back yard” communion wine.
“Ask not for whom the bells toll; it tolls for “Papa-Ratzi” (all my regrets to J. Donne and GBjr.)…
As “Papa-Ratzi” takes the crown and greets the folks as Benedict the XVI (is this where the Miss America Pageant got the idea to change the winner’s name from the state they represent to Miss America?) I have to question the security of the voting process…who’s checking the ballots if they are burnt? Shouldn’t there be some accounting firm overseeing the results? On second thought, if it’s like the US elections, there may be no clear winner for months! I wonder if another Cardinal in the running can ask for a recount.
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