The most likely defense for Miss Crazy Astronaut 2007, Lisa Nowak, would seem to be, "the 'TANG made me do it!" What better excuse is there than to craftily link the government-created Vitamin C power with wacky behavior? There's conspiracy written allover this puppy! Where are Mulder and Scully when we really could use them? Investigating Libby?
As much sense as it might make, I hope they don't blame "being crazy", as in, "Lisa Nowak went crazy when she looked into Bill Oefelin's eyes", as her excuse for her behavior. That just makes crazy sound like it's a bad thing. Must "crazy" be defended (and thus, several of my past relationships)? Hey, who hasn't been able to chalk at least one "ex" up to being "crazy"? And yet (most of us) have stayed out of jail. Crazy isn't always a bad thing. Without it where would those fantastic loves songs, like "Crazy Little Thing Called Love", "Crazy in Love", "Crazy on You", "Mama We're All Crazy Now", "Crazy Frog", "Crazy for You", or just plain "Crazy" be?
Hell, listening to poor old Babs, it's assumptive, but she wasn't dating anyone crazy at the time she sang, "it's raining, it's pouring, my love life is boring me to tears...." apparently Don Johnson was right around the corner.
So stand up for "crazy" love rights, fight the powers that aim to make "crazy" just an excuse for wearing adult diapers, own your own form of "crazy"...don't just let it be tossed around in the court of law like a hooker on "free Fridays"!
Now, if drinking the TANG caused this issue, one can only wonder, "What Would Lance Bass have done (WWLBD) if he gotten to be an astronaut? Hey, maybe the Tang-in-training made him gay! Maybe that's what they weaned poor old Ted Haggard off of to cure him!
So here's Ms. Nowak's new anthem,
"Shot to the heart, and Tang's to blame,
Baby Tang gave love, a bad name"!
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