on my radar: satellite burn out

Well paint me boondoggled and put me to bed hungry ( I love to mix metaphors about as much as Tara Reid mixes drinks; I think her calling, besides "Happy Hour Ho" is as a barista)!

There was so much craziness in the world this past week (and I am not referring to the primaries) that I was seriously thinking I was a character on LOST and direly needed to find my "constant" before my brain exploded!

What's up with NASA aiming a rocket at a dead satellite? They claim they hit the mark (for a paltry $60M)but I would challenge that assertion because Larry King is still on the air (and looking as dead as ever). Given that Larry was attempting to bust-a-move with Janet Jackson the other night, it is obvious Janet must still be paying some form of penance for the Timberlake/SuperBowl fiasco. Larry King dances like..., never mind, he can't dance, end of story! At first I thought Larry was a suspender-clad Zombie-guy in the "Thriller" video, he was so stiff, but then I realized it was Janet, not Michael, on the show; Larry was still a suspender-clad stiff on the CNN studio dance floor.

Why didn't NASA just hire those natural born killers, Hell's Angels, to take out the satellite and save the $60M (who's paying for that I wonder?)? Oh, that's right, because they couldn't even complete the hit job on "let's spend the night together," Mick Jaegger, that they attempted back in 1969. Apparently, when it comes to follow through and marksmanship, Jack Ruby, Lee Harvey Oswald, Sirhan Sirhan and James Earl Ray are more reliable- go figure! Bet that makes the Angels feel like sissies- no wonder it took 40 years for the story to come to light. I wonder if the guys who failed in this attempt had to give up their hogs and ride in the sidecart for a year?

I'm not one to mock death (usually), but the strange and tragic demise of Katoucha Niane, the former supermodel whose body was found in the Seine River, answered the age old (or at least as old as Janice Dickinson) question, "if a model falls in a river, does she make a sound?" Apparently not. Of course, this got me wondering if maybe the Hells Angels were behind this.

So the lesson here are it's ok to piss of the hells Angels, they won't kill you, but piss off the FCC and you're stuck dancing with a stiff on CNN (not Dancing with the Star, or dead satellites). And as Casey Kasem used to say, keep your feet on the ground (stay off boats my dear models) and keep reaching for the non-falling objects in space!