I wonder if Jenna Bush will be using a Topsy Tale, the very clever hair braiding tool, as seen on TV, for her big 'do on her big day? Will she wear all-white and have just a seam of grey threading on her dress or will she think that we've all forgot her fake-ID ways and believe she made it through wilderness (better than Bear Gryllis), some how she made it through, conquering her bouts of feeling beat, incomplete; overcoming the fits of being sad and blue and still a virgin at the chapel?? Will the wedding rival Luke and Laura's? Or will it be fiascoesque like Amanda's was on "Dynasty" (the Moldavian massacre)- okay, I don't mean that in a morbid sense, but the wedding is in Crawford, Texas, so that's got to be somewhat depressing enough. Maybe they local authorities could put all the confiscated children from the Yearning for Zion polygamist ranch to work as flower girls and ring bearers- wouldn't they be adorable in muted colors and matching outfits! Or would they distract from the wedding program when Barbara Bush freaks out thinking "the children of the damned village" just got loose? Next thing you know you've got the scene from Chitty-Chitty Bang Bang ("our fine four fender friend") with little children everywhere and the adults scampering to get away from them. Guess it's best not to bring those kids to the wedding- they've seen enough within the compound already!
I'm so tired of second-guessing "WWJD", thank god her wedding day is finally here and all speculation will cease!
Do you think Dick Cheney was invited, and will they let him bring a gun to the reception? Will they allow his lesbian daughter, Mary, and her significant other, (but not in the eyes of any red-blooded Republican) to be present and seated next to one another? Do you think the first father-daughter dance will be "Isn't She Lovely" or will they go for something more hip and upbeat, like "Low". No, my mistake, scratch that, this wedding is in Texas, not the cellar of a house in Austria. Maybe it'll be the Ting-Ting's new song, "shut up and let me go", really, a great choice if you ask me. Do you think daddy has asked Jenna what she plans to spend her tax check on, or did she blow it on the wedding announcements already- no new money being pumped into the economy!
My closing thoughts, do you think the McCains sent a gift, and if so, will Cindy ever disclose what it is, a keg of beer and some steins perhaps? And finally, will daddy fall off the wagon when his little girl gets hitched, will he kick a few back and bring an eight ball to the reception, like in the old days?
8 comments:
oh GOOOOD! the topsy tail! i remember rocking that. oof. i think she might do the lc braid. that might work for her.
Errr.... Hi, my name is Heart of Darkness, and I'm a former Topsy Tail user...
here's where you all go "Hi Heart!"
Jenna Bush is like the closest to contemporary royalty you get, isn't she? I mean, it's basically like the rumors on whether princess Victoria of Sweden is gonna get hitched to her gym-owner boyfriend this summer, or not...
Call me boring, but that's just another wedding I'm gnna ignore! :D
Topsy Tail! Oh man. I rocked that thing. I remember BEGGING my mom for it. Oh, how foolish I was. As for the wedding, I wonder if George W sang. I've heard it before and it wasn't pretty. Also, I wonder where Condi sat.
Brookem: If the lc braid has anything to do with the polygamist style, Jenna could rock it!
Hi Heart! Royalty might be one way to look at the wedding, but it's actually been so low-key, that crazy Mariah Carey's "has she/is there a prenup" discussion has over shadowed Jenna's day.
Brandy: I'm thnking any Bush gathering that Condi has to attend there must be an agreement to seat her close to the bar! I don't think W sang, but he did break out in the Cupid Shuffle!
See, that's what I don't get - especially Hollywood couples get hitched and divorced more frequent then they change their underwear, so what's the big fuss? Do people bet on how long it's gonna last? or is it that we simply wish them the best, because if the rich-gorgeous-and-fabulous can't make, how can average Joe&Jane...?
Ahahaha -what a blast from the past. I don't know if that even works; I'll have to wonder now :P
Heart- have you heard of Intrade? it's a site that actually bets on all things pop culture: when Brit will get arrested again, how long a marriage will last, who will win president...I think it's illegal for US folks, but it appears someone is making money off random stuff (like a stephen king plot...)
Carrie: nxt thing you know we'll be walking around in our romper stompers and playing with a flow-bee for a perfect feathered hair style!
Ha ha - I had not heard of it, but it is a good idea. People do keep tracks of the lives of celebrities. I suppose it's easier then to keep track of their own lives... :)
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