Thursday, June 12, 2008

on my radar: hold the tomatoes

If it wasn't hard enough to get kids to eat tomatoes in the first place, along comes an outbreak to scare everyone away! We need our lycopene! I guess the "love apples" must be experiencing feelings somewhat akin to how Tonya Harding felt after that nasty bout of jealousy! The rational side of me says, "hey, just in time for beach season- a small bout of salmonella will help me fit into that damn suit!" But the Lauren Hutton side of me says, well...the Lauren Hutton side of me says crazy-ass crap that makes no sense but somehow includes guacamole and guac has tomatoes in it so that must be what's gone to her head! She needs sleeps! I get the impression she woke up (like 4 days ago) on the Sean Young side of the bed!

Me thinks it's about time Mr. McMahon puts his own name into the "Publishers Clearinghouse Sweepstakes" drawing...it's hard to muster ANY sympathy for someone who is struggling to make the payments on a $7.5 Million dollar home; sell the damn thing and get out from under it already, or stark hawking more Breathe Assure and quit divorcing so many women!

I'd recommend that maybe Miss Hutton, Mr. McMahon and Miss Heigl should go on a PR tour to do some spin control, but I'm afraid people would just throw tomatoes at them! I know three people who could use a pocketful of sunshine right about now!


5 comments:

Dizzie said...

I don't know what was in that syringe, but Botox it was not!


Ms Hutton, NEVER go retail on those procedures!!!! :O

Radioactive Tori said...

I think I must have missed the Heigl story. Now I need to go google.

Radioactive Tori said...

P.S. Did that sound dirty? Because it wasn't but reading it back it sort of sounds like it to me.

EF said...

Heart: I see her as a great role model for being crazy and over 50!

radio: she was just being honest about her scripts and people got peeved- sad when you get in trouble for being honest, huh?
I like the sounds of a "heigl google" it does sound dirty!

Princess Pointful said...

It just seems way too odd that veggies, of all things, can cause food poisoning. While I understand the whole, um, feces, problems... I can't help but wonder if people may have through some raw chicken in the tomato box, too.